3.28.2015

Good Coffee Houses a Dying Breed in L.A.

The Library in Long Beach
 Not much good came from the 90's. After Courtney murdered Kurt, record execs tried to replace Nirvana with a slew of bad grunge bands. The result? An army of flanneled losers who put the "r" sound where vowels should have been. It's true. Take any grunge song and sing the "r" sounds where the vowels go. Boom, you're Eddie Vedder. Or the dude from Soundgarden. Or Bush. Or whatever.

gorgeous wall stencils
There were three good things that came from the 90's though: Clueless, Friends and neighborhood coffee shops. I love coffee houses so much, I've blogged about the best of them in L.A.

But I stand corrected. The absolute best one by far is The Library in Long Beach. Exposed brick interiors, a grand piano, sunken velvet couches and worn Oriental rugs; it's like a Bohemian drawing room. But the menu - they provide endless types of mocha. I miss the old Mocha Valencias at Starbucks, but chocolate-orange is a flavor at the library. Almond Joy mochas, rare teas, gourmet food - even ice cream.

complete with a bad 90's painting

Normally I hate divulging my secret spots in Los Angeles. I don't want people picking at  rare discoveries at my hidden vintage stores. But with a Starbucks on every corner, these authentic hideaways are a dying breed. We need this authenticity before all of our streets are blanketed by mall stores. Keep The Library going; it will be a gift for yourself even more than it is for them. 

feels like New York



3.14.2015

L.A. just got even harder for ugly people!


Historically, if you weren't good-looking enough to make it as an actor in this town, you could at least support yourself by waiting tables. Looks like that might be on the way out as well.  Because God forbid your canape gets served to you by someone who looks like they eat them. People who don't eat will be served by people who really don't eat, and all the ugly people will either have to take up janitor work or get out of Dodge. 

Or, how about this? I propose that people get cast for realistic roles. If we see hideous-looking people on the freeways, in the gym and the store, why aren't these people be represented in film, where actors are on freeways, at the gym and in the store? On TV, every middle-aged dolt is somehow married to a supermodel MENSA member twenty years their junior, and no one says anything. In film, everyone in the produce section of the grocery store is a girl in a half shirt squeezing melons. I don't know about you, but the last time I was in grocery store, a homeless guy was changing clothes in the bathroom. 

So let the hotties take over food service. But only on the condition that the less-attractive folk get re-integrated on screen. We must remember actors aren't models, and shouldn't be held to those standards. They are but people hired to play all sectors of the population. Tired moms, tubby alcoholics, greasy pizza shop owners, etc. That way, the less attractive will get their fair shot, and runway types will be forced to come face to face with food.