9.28.2009

It Ain't Easy Being Gay in Los Angeles

Being gay anywhere is tough. In small towns, if locals aren't trying to save you from "eternal hellfire," they're kicking you in the ribs in dark alleys. Drag queens get so much guff, they have become a population of fierce and fearless fighters.

One might say in a liberal town such as Los Angeles, homosexuals have it easier. But my friend Scott put it all into perspective when he said, "I can't afford to be gay in L.A. - I don't have enough time for the gym!" This town may be liberal politically, but gay men aren't so open-minded when it comes to physical beauty. Each of them aspire to be an Adonis. They all look like soap stars, with six packs, caramel tans and highlights. If you think it's hard being gay in a town where mullets are still the hairstyle of choice, try giving up beer and pizza...forever.

I went to a pool party recently, and the shirtless men created a sea of white mocha-colored muscles hovering above an aqua pool. Every man looked so meticulously toned and groomed, I decided not to swim, but drink and feel sorry for myself.

If you don't believe me, see the videos:






Sigh.

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